Monday, July 14, 2008

[Venture Brothers] What Goes Down, Must Come Up


Season 3, Episode 7: What Goes Down, Must Come Up

This is why I watch The Venture Bros. If you read through my reviews of season 3, you'll see that I haven't really disliked any of the episodes thus far, but still it seemed as if there was a certain je ne sais crois missing. I think this episode provided exactly what the season needed. As I said in the "Dr. Quymn" review, I appreciate that they're letting all of the characters grow and not letting them stay stagnant, but at the same time I feel like when they focused a lot of their efforts on this it detracted from the humor. This episode was absolutely hilarious through and through. Jefferson Twilight notably had some incredibly lines.

The episode was also one of the best of the show's many examples of deconstructing the mythos of cold-war era Johnny Quest type adventure shows. In this episode we're treated to a flashback of children on a field trip to see Jonas Venture's underground fallout shelter, only to have MUTHER, the scorned housewife of an A.I. release poison gas throughout the facility, leading to Jonas, The Action Man, Kano, and Colonel Gentlemen promptly rushing to action to save themselves and no one else. Just fantastic.

Episode rating: Like getting a free invisible mom

Favorite bits\random thoughts:

-Pretty much everything Jefferson Twilight said over the course of the episode was brilliant. "Aw man, now I got blue balls in my blood eye!" "They weren't taken by Blackulas, although I can't rule out Caucasian vampires." The entire running gag of Jefferson's lack of usefulness for the Order's particular situation was hilarious.

-There were some more music video references, with the guy in the Captain America-ish getup running through the sewer being coming straight out of this Prodigy video.

-Peter White sitting with a John 3:16 sign in one hand and a margarita in the other
as he's convinced that nuclear annihilation is imminent was kind of out of nowhere but made me laugh for some reason.

-MUTHER being referred to as "some Atari bitch," lol.

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Rich Harden

Its been a little while since I posted about the Cubs, but there's no better time to start again than right now. Just a couple of days removed from the Brewers' acquisition of C. C. Sabathia from the Indians, the Cubs made a 6 player trade to nab Rich Harden from the A's. The complete trade is as follows:

A's Trade:

Rich Harden
Chad Gaudin

Cubs Trade:

Matt Murton
Sean Gallagher
Eric Patterson
(Single-A catcher) Josh Donaldson

Harden this year is 5-1 with a 2.34 ERA in 13 starts, which would put him 2nd in the AL in ERA behind teammate Justin Duchsherer were it not for the fact that he's just under the innings pitched requirement to qualify. The biggest concern with him has been injuries, as he's missed some time this year, and made only 13 combined starts in 2006 and 2007. Chad Gaudin has been used as a long reliever and spot starter and has a 3.59 ERA himself. The inclusion of Gaudin is nice as it sort of negates Gallagher's departure in the sense that the Cubs still have some depth if Harden or someone else gets injured.

Getting a pitcher like Rich Harden in a pennant race is a good thing, period, but what makes this truly a great trade is that, although they gave up four players, for the most part its not going to weaken the Cubs MLB club in other areas this season nor should it hinder the farm system much in the future. Obviously, Sean Gallagher is the biggest loss. Even though he was about to head back to the bullpen with the return from the DL of Carlos Zambrano and the emergence of Sean Marshall, he's had several good starts this year. It's possible that he develops into a very good pitcher, but really his is the only loss that really has you wondering "what if we're giving up more than we think?" Matt Murton is 26. He may turn into a viable everyday player in Oakland, but he's not going to get leaps and bounds better than what he is now. He can hit some home runs and he plays hard, but he's somewhat of a liability in the outfield, and doesn't really have the massive power numbers that you'd expect from a starting corner outfielder on a contending team. Murton's been the odd man out in the Cubs' outfield plans for a while now, and you'll recall he started the year in AAA Iowa. Eric Patterson is much younger than Murton and still has time to develop, but during his time in the majors, he has yet to show much evidence that he would be much better than his brother Corey who is currently wasting away on the bench with the Reds.

A playoff rotation of Zambrano/Harden/Dempster (with the added off days that they put in last year--which I hate--a 3-man rotation is really all you'll need) could be incredibly fearsome. This isn't even a "rent-a-player" type of situation, as Harden's contract has a club option for 2009. This is one of the best trades that Jim Hendry has made.

The Cubs beat the Reds at home last night in the opener of the series. They're coming off of a road trip that was shaky, as most of their road play has been to this point, but ended with the Cubs taking 2 out of 3 from the Cardinals at Busch.

Monday, July 07, 2008

[Venture Brothers] Doctor Quymn, Medicine Woman


Season 3 Episode 6: Doctor Quymn, Medicine Woman

Wow. A very hormone filled Venture Brothers this week. Even Dean almost got himself some, and from twins no less! Season 3 has definitely made a much more concerted effort than the last two season of furthering the development of the characters. As Dean says to Hank, "You're not used to be about 'Go Team Venture!", now you're all "Go Team... Boobies!" The kids are growing up, although who knows when the next time will be when they accidentally die and get reverted back to their 16th birthday again. This episode had some so-so parts but also some absolutely classic lines.

Episode rating: Like having a Quicktime of your minty fresh entrance on your Livejournal, even if you raided the wrong place

Favorite bits\random thoughts:

-The aforementioned "Go team boobies!" line, probably the single funniest thing from this season so far.

-Brock, Hank, and Dean teaching a gorilla to box on Dr. Venture's orders, then the monkey
subsequently fighting the "wereodile" at the end.

-I wasn't entirely sure what they were going for with the more-than-a-little-bit disturbing stuff between Ginnie, Dr. Quymn's bodyguard, and Brock. That was just odd. Although Dean yelling "The both of yous got jungle fever!" was amazing.

[Venture Brothers] The Buddy System


Season 3, Episode 5: The Buddy System

A pretty fantastic episode and maybe my favorite from this season. It took place entirely on the Venture compound, and it reminded me a lot of the yard sale episode from the first season. This season's had much more of a main overarching storyline than either of the last two. With Sargent Hatred now apparently done arching Venture, I kind of hope we get an episode that's just sort of self-contained and off the wall nuts like "Escape from the House of Mummies" from last season. Not that these episodes haven't been enjoyable, but I think its time for a reprieve from the storyline they've been working with.

Episode rating: Like a trip to Brisby World

Favorite bits/random thoughts:

-The Order of the Triad's safety song. Radon!

-Brock trying to hire the moppets to beat up the annoying teenage kid, only to realize that they're "pretty creepy"

I forget what else because I've had this saved as a draft for a week and forgot to finish it, but just take my word for it that this was a good episode.

Monday, June 23, 2008

The Friendly Confines

Last week, the Cubs got swept by the Rays on the road (still want to type Devil Rays) in a frustrating series, the last game of which saw the Rays score 7 runs in the 7th to win 8-3. Carlos Marmol failed to retire a batter while walking 2 and hitting another 2 guys. He appeared again in the White Sox series over the weekend, and while it was a less disastrous outing, he still didn't look quite right. Hopefully its not a result of him being overworked (and he has been worked A LOT in the first half of this season-- on pace for about 94 IP). The aforementioned White Sox series was at home and ended up in a sweep, running the Cubs' home winning streak to 14 games. They're an almost unfathomable 32-8 at Wrigley thus far, compared to 16-20 on the road.

Aramis Ramirez had a fantastic series, going 6-for-14 with 4 HRs. He's now one away from trying Derrek Lee and Alphonso Soriano for the team lead at 15. Ryan Dempster almost got his second complete game of the year, running his record to 9-2 with a 2.63 ERA. Dempster now leads the team in ERA, wins, winning percentage, WHIP, and hits per 9 IP. Right now Edinson Volquez is playing out of his mind, but its not inconceivable that Dempster could be in the discussion for Cy Young at the end of the year. With 16 starts under his belt, I think its certainly safe to say that his success isn't a flake and that the work he put in during the off-season made a huge difference in his pitching. He's certainly exceeded my expectations--and I suspect most everyone else's expectations--for how he would perform as a starter.

Carlos Zambrano left his start in Tampa Bay after feeling something in his shoulder. An MRI did not reveal any structural damage, which is great news. He has, however, been placed on the 15-day DL and will miss some time. Sean Marshall is expected to start Tuesday against the Orioles. Right now the Cubs are carrying 14 hitters so someone is going to be sent down. It seemed obvious that it would be Eric Patterson, but Patterson decided to have a huge series against the White Sox going 5-for-8 with a home run and 3 RBIs. Matt Murton, who was called up before the Tampa Bay series might get sent down, though he's had a few key hits as well. Another dilemma is going to present itself when Darryl Ward gets healthy, which Jim Hendry claimed over the weekend might happen as early as this week (I believe he's already on a rehab assignment). In his absense Micah Hoffpauir has been hitting .400 in 35 ABs, and I'm not convinced that Ward is necessarily better than him.

FYI, lest you think I pull these out of my ass, as always all the stats in this post are from Baseball Reference. I can't stress enough how amazing a resource the site is.

[Venture Brothers] Home is Where the Hate is


Season 3, Episode 4: Home is Where the Hate is

Funny episode. Probably not my favorite of the season thus far (gonna give that to "The Doctor is Sin", I think), but funny.

Episode rating: Like a guy with a fever yelling at your pants

Favorite bits & random thoughts:

-21, 24, Hank and Dean determining who could do the best Pac-Man noise. "No, it only sounded like that when you died! When you were just goin' along eating dots it was more like "Wakka-wakka-wakka-wakka..."

-Brock watching a PBS special on "giant crossbows." "I wanna see 'em fire this thing!"

-21 sending in Dean to play Patch Adams for 24, to which 24 can only reply, "I hate you!"

-The Monarch acknowledging that 24 sounds exactly like Ray Ramano

-The Monarch expressing his undying hatred for Dr. Venture, while Dr. Venture assumes that he's still playing the "guess the sign on your back" game. "Am I Hitler? Ohhh, Mariah Carey, of course!"

-Sargent Hatred with "ATRED" spelled down the length of his chest to go along with the "H" on his head.

A Sargent Hatred/Monarch feud has a lot of potential to be funny.

[Venture Brothers] The Invisible Hand of Fate

Season 3, Episode 3: The Invisible Hand of Fate

In a sharp departure from the previous two seasons, three episodes into season 3 of "The Venture Bros." we've already had two episodes that feature the main characters only very briefly. In this case, we learn more about the past of Master Billy Quizboy, namely how in the hell his hand ended up like that. The episode was funny, though it didn't have as many laugh-out-loud moments as the first two episodes. I'd say it was probably the weakest of the three episodes thus far. With that said, the episode is pretty cool in the way it ties up some of the remaining loose ends regarding how characters came to know each other and how they got in their current positions. Its amazing how much care Jackson Publik and Doc Hammer put into keeping the continuity of their show consistent, while still keeping the show fresh and funny.

Anyway, its been 2 weeks now since I've seen this episode so I'm not going to do a full list of bits that I liked, but I do want to point out the sequence at the end that's made up of a bunch of quick cuts with Brock bringing Billy back to Pete and then going off to start "Operation: Rusty's Blanket." It was actually oddly touching.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Sometimes things just go your way

The Cubs finished their west coast road swing against the Dodgers and Padres 4-3, and won their first game back at home against the Braves last night. Ted Lilly recovered after a rough 1st inning to get his 6th win, and the still-best-in-the-NL Cubs offense put up 10 more runs. The best news for the Cubs as far as their playoff chances are concerned may actually be what's happening with St. Louis. The Cardinals are currently the only team reasonably close to the Cubs at 2 1/2 games back (next is the Brewers at 7 1/2 back), and while it certainly seemed as if they were overachieving when they got off to a hot start, they're still 12 over .500 about 40% of the way through the season. If the Cardinals are going to fall of though, this may be the stretch in which it happens. Their top 2 pitchers in terms of ERA, Adam Wainwright and Todd Wellemeyer, have both missed starts with injury, although Wellemeyer's injury isn't believed to be serious at the moment. A much bigger blow may have happened last night, when Albert Pujols left after sustaining a calf injury running out of the box that was described as "pretty bad." The next team after the Cardinals is the Brewers at 33-31, who have not hit nearly as well as expected (they're currently 14th in the NL in batting average and OBP). Rickie Weeks is hitting .210, J.J. Hardy's hitting .242, and Prince Fielder has a good but not great OPS of .825 with 10 HRs. They'll probably finish out better offensively than they're playing now, but it certainly doesn't look like the team is going to have improved leaps and bounds from last year, as many thought. The Cubs's road to winning the division hasn't had too many bumps in it to this point.

Monday, June 09, 2008

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (***)

It's been 19 years since we last saw our whip adept, ophidiophobic, archaeologist on an adventure containing giant rolling stones of death, melting Nazis, heart stealing witch doctors, Alfred Molina, or some combination thereof. When we see Indiana Jones now in Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, he's a step or two slower and has a lot more gray hair, but the same basic formula is still in place, as Stephen Spielberg, George Lucas, and Harrison Ford reunite for one last installment of the franchise. There's still all manner of chase sequences on period accurate vehicles of all sorts, there's still ancient burial sites with deviously clever traps, and there's still villains everywhere trying to cramp Indy's style and claim the treasure for themselves. Yet, the synergy of all these radio serial adventure type elements don't really add up to as good a finished product this time around, although the movie is still certainly an entertaining watch.

The film begins in 1958 with Indy and "Mac", an old acquaintance he's known from World War II being held captive by Russians, who pose as U.S. army personnel and break into Area 51 in the Nevada Desert. They are led by Cate Blanchett, a completely stereotypical Russian villainess (think: "I will crush the American capitalist scum with my superior Russian intellect!", that sort of thing) who specializes in the paranormal and is researching artifacts that can be used for "psychic warfare". I suppose I shouldn't spoil it, but within the military warehouse she finds something of interest to her that ties into the plot later on. Indy meanwhile, uses a distraction to start whipping people like the good old days, and tries to escape, leading to what is probably the best of the myriad chase sequences throughout the movie. Harrison Ford's performance is probably at its best during these early scenes. He's old, he's grumpy, he seems to be sort of worn out of these strange situations he always gets himself into, and it adds up to being very funny.

After this relatively encouraging opening which ends with some of the most preposterous deus ex machinas of all time, we see that Dr. Jones is still a university professor, and so we get a few plot points to get him back out of the classroom. On a train out of town, Jones meets Mutt (Shia LaBueff), a high school drop out greaser and biker mechanic who tells Dr. Jones that one of his colleages, Dr. Oxley or "Ox" has gone missing in South America. Turns out Ox (who is played by John Hurt for some reason even though he doesn't have much to do other than act crazy) has been committed to a sanitarium after he sound a legendary crystal skull that is the source for the movie's subtitle and is the goal of the quest in this iteration. As it turns out, who'd have thunk it, but the same Russians from the movie's first sequence are going after the skull as well because its believed to have psychic powers. Indy and Mutt go tomb raiding and find the skull in its original resting place--Ox had returned it for yet to be revealed reasons--only to find that the Russians are waiting outside for them.

It's once Indy and Mutt head into the jungles of Peru with the Russians that my tolerance for some of the movie's cliches and over-the-top ridiculousness started to waver. I understand that the entire Indiana Jones franchise is based off of old serial adventure stories and indeed that's a big reason why the original trilogy was so fun, but there is a point when your suspension of disbelief is just shot and it's all too much. For me, this was somewhere around the time when Indy and company along with the Russians are riding in a convoy of trucks along the outskirts of the jungle, and monkeys come out of the trees and seemingly instinctively know to go bat shit crazy on the villains and leave the main characters alone completely.

There is more silliness when Marion (played by Karen Allen, as she was in Raiders) pops up in the film, coincidentally also captured by the Russians. There seems to be little point in her being in the movie, except to engage in completely unfunny banter with Indy every once in a while. There are multiple instances of the clichéd "let's have an argument about our relationship even though we're in extreme danger right now" bit that completely fall flat. Beyond that, she never really seems concerned at all about any of what's going on around her during the action sequences. There are times in which Mutt and Indy are literally under fire from a dozen Russian troops and this will be intercut with a shot of Karen Allen with a sort of contended half-smile on her face. I also thought the film had a few two many in-references and moments that were very self-aware of the fact that this was the big long-expected fourth Indiana Jones movie. In particular, there are a lot of moments where Indy is able to get his hat back at the last minute despite losing it while a crazy amount of stuff is happening to him. Sometimes its funny, sometimes its just too clever by half.

Once all these chase sequences are done with and the true nature of the skull, and why Oxley was going nuts, and all the other mysteries in the film are solved, there is a climactic sequence that's very much reminiscent of how Raiders or Last Crusade ended, and yet somehow isn't as satisfying. Maybe it's the heavy and obvious use of CGI, or the fact that the big reveal at the end is in some ways even more ambitious than the "oh shit, Judeo-Christian mythology is real and the Nazis are going to get what's coming to them!" moments from the previous films, but it just doesn't quite add up the way the endings to said films did.

Even with all this going against the movie, I do think it's worth viewing, if perhaps only after it leaves theaters and comes to DVD. While I think the script for this latest iteration was somewhat phoned in, and the action sequences are much more clichéd and uninspired than you would expect from Spielberg, some of the Indy allure is still there. Harrison Ford's performance is very good, and he does a great job of maintaining the quick wit and grittiness that's always been in the character, while making him more world-weary and more of a cynical old man sort. In no way is this movie destined to become a Spielberg classic, but its not a complete disaster.

Sunday, June 08, 2008

[Venture Brothers] The Doctor is Sin

Season 3, Episode 2: The Doctor is Sin

After the Monarch and Dr. Girlfriend-centric season premiere, we get an episode that focuses again on the Venture family themselves first and foremost. We learn that ever since The Monarch stopped arching Dr. Venture, many a villain has attempted to take The Monarch's place only to get their asses handed to them by Brock (who gets a little tired of it after a while). Between this and the fact that the military doesn't seem to think too much of his new inventions (which seem to be mostly his father's old inventions) Rusty finds himself in rut. Enter: Dr. Henry Killinger, who shows his extensive resume and immediately begins to rejuvenate Venture Industries (but at what cost? dun dun dunnnn). Another episode, of which there were several last season, that doesn't really seem to be going anywhere in terms of story at first, but ends up not only having a satisfying conclusion, but is hilarious.

Episode Rating: Like having your own team of non-union, government paid Vench-men

Favorite bits & random thoughts:

-Brock gives pretty much the only appropriate answer to Dr. Venture's question "Am I a good person?": "Eh..." complete with the side-to-side hand wave thing.
-Apparently the magic murder bag actually is a magic murder bag. And a quite effective one at that.
-In the season 2 commentary they claimed that season 3 wouldn't have any Star Wars references. Well, I think in the 2nd episode there's already been one, as Dr. Killinger tells Rusty to enter the odd virtual world that apparently exists inside his bag and he answers Rusty's question of "What's in there" with "Only what you take with you." I'm pretty sure that's exactly what Yoda tells Luke when he goes into the cave and sees the bogus Darth Vader. At any rate, it was funny. If they want to continue to break their commitment to no Star Wars references that's fine with me.
-Dr. Orpheus leaving the building with his European business man costume on, then running in plain sight while taking off his costume and going to put on the next one was just fantastic.
-The Lion King-esque face in the clouds ending: completely random but also fantastic. "You can learn more about it in The Bible"
-The Alchemist is still around, but where's Jefferson Twilight?

Iron Man

Iron Man (***1/2)

I'm sort of late to the party on Iron Man, which came out in early May and immediately made tons of money and got tons of hype. Having finally seen it last weekend, I can confirm that the hype was very much justified, and that the movie proves that it is still possible to make a superhero movie that doesn't feel like a cookie-cutter re-branding of another movie, despite how many superhero movies are out there now. It's a very intelligently written movie, and it manages to maintain a certain degree of unpredictability, despite having the core "Guy becomes hero, hero discovers villain, hero beats up villain" plotline that most of these Marvel/DC movies are based around.

The movie begins by introducing us to Tony Stark, who is very much true to his character's portrayal in Marvel comics. He's a genius when it comes to engineering, but he's also a drinker, a womanizer, and in just about every other way someone who lives live with reckless abandon. This is how he's first presented to us as he's riding in a Humvee with U.S. soldiers on his way back from a weapons demonstration for his company, Stark Industries, somewhere in Afghanistan. Things hit a snag for him, to put it mildly, when the convoy of Humvees is the target of an attack and Tony finds himself in the hands of a terrorist organization (a fictional one, whose members are made up of many different nationalities, no doubt to stave off controversy). He has shrapnel lodged in his chest that would've pierced his heart and killed him, were it not for another scientist captured with him who keeps him alive with an electromagnet hooked up to a car battery (I strongly question the validity of the medicine behind all this but whatever, it's a comic book movie). In a cruel twist of fate, Stark realizes that he's being kept alive so he can build the very missile he just demonstrated for the U.S. military for his captors.

Stark, of course, has other ideas, and creates an early prototype of the Iron Man suit and uses it to escape. He also makes a breakthrough in "arc reactor" technology (no idea if this has a real world equivalent, be it actually functional or theoretical), which he uses to power the electromagnet in his chest without him having to be dragging a car battery along. Upon his return to the U.S. he has a sort of epiphany and decides that Stark Industries, despite being primary a weapons manufacturer, since the weapons keep ending up in the hands of the wrong people. This doesn't go over well with Obadiah Stane (Jeff Bridges), who briefly headed the company after Tony's father died but before Tony was old enough to become CEO himself.

Much of the next section of the film tracks Tony's progress as he designs a new and improved Iron Man suit--without letting Obadiah or the rest of the company know--in the lab in his mansion. He does it with the help of Jarvis, the personality of the super-sophisticated AI that controls his entire house. In a movie in which everything that's not owned by Tony Stark basically resembles our, normal present day world, the fact that Jarvis seems to rival the computer from Star Trek: The Next Generation in intelligence is a little cartoonish, but I can forgive that because a. it's a comic book movie and b. it leads to some extremely funny exchanges between Tony and the various robotic appendages that Jarvis controls. Tony's near obsessive level of devotion to his new project concerns his devoted, if perhaps somewhat overwhelmed at times, assistant, Pepper Potts (Gweneth Paltrow). She doesn't have a huge role, but there are some very good scenes in which we see her doing the best she can to be a companion to the loner that is Tony Stark while not encouraging his more self-destructive habits. Their relationship has some vague sexual tension, but doesn't turn into a hokey love story which at times seem to be a prerequisite for any big Hollywood movie. This, along with the fact that the movie is more about Tony building the suit and taking on the identity of Iron Man than him endlessly fighting random guys as Iron Man makes the movie stand out amongst the cluster**** of big budget superhero movies, and hopefully will influence the myriad superhero movies that are still on the way.

The movie ends with the requisite hero vs. villain confutation, and has the much expected "greed is bad, selfless is good" morality tale woven in, but the movie is well-written enough and the performances by Downey Jr., Bridges, and Paltrow are good enough such that the movie feels like it has something unique to contribute to the genre and isn't just a cookie-cutter duplicate of other movies with a different guy in a different costume. It also sets itself up for sequel in a way that actually makes you believe that a sequel would actually branch out from what the original was, instead of just swapping villains and rehashing mostly the same plot. This is a superhero movie done right.

Monday, June 02, 2008

[Venture Brothers] Shadowman 9: In the Cradle of Destiny

Season 3, Episode 1: Shadowman 9: In the Cradle of Destiny

The Venture Bros. is one of my favorite shows currently airing on TV, animated or otherwise, and the almost 2 year wait for season 3 to start has been absolutely brutal. At long last its here, and if the first episode is any indication, co-creators Jackson Publick and Doc Hammer (yeah, those are their actual names) haven't missed a beat. If you've never seen the show it's nigh impossible for it to be fully explained to you, but my attempt at a one sentence summary is this: It's like Johnny Quest on crack. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend checking it out, but in the meantime here's some random thoughts on the season 3 premiere for those already indoctrinated.

Rating: Like two ninjas taped together to form one giant ninja

Favorite bits/quotes: (with aid from The Mantis Eye Experiment)

-The Monarch: Oh man, if that shows up on YouTube- I- I'm serious! What kind of torture is this? Couldn't you just drill my teeth, or shove bamboo under my nails or something.
Councilman: This is not a torture, Mr. Monarch.
Councilman: It is an interrogation!
Councilman: Or a trial of sorts!
Councilman: I always say, it's a crucible.
Councilman: Oh that's way cooler!

-The Henchmen rolling away a giant penny, referencing the one that's always shown in the Bat Cave.

-The Monarch tearing through Dr. Ventures lab with his early, crappy version of the Monarch mobile, pulling a lever up and down while he's driving to make the crudely attached wings on top flap.

-The Monarch: I would have taken him down then if Venture hadn't hired a private army of ex-Navy Seal ninja witches to protect him. Also my memory is a little foggy, but I'm pretty sure he had a fucking tank.

-The Monarch
: Wait, wait, did that video have a wipe?
Councilman: Councilman 3 got Adobe Premiere.
Councilman 3: Was it too showy? I thought it would make the scene more lively.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Why I Never Want to See PNC Park Again

I don't think I can name any single stranger thing from the first 50 or so games of the Cubs' season than what's happened on the road against the Pirates. In their first 6 games at PNC park, they've played a total of 71 innings, as 4 games have gone into extra innings. After winning game 1 of the series over last weekend, the Cubs dropped the next two in extras after blowing 1 run leads in the 9th inning of each game. In the Sunday game, Alphonso Soriano lost a ball in the sun attempting to make what would've been the final out. He still hasn't looked 100% baserunning or playing defense.

Making up for the painfulness of the Pirates series, however, was a sweep which the Cubs just completed at the hands of the Dodgers. Every game of the series was close and low scoring, and got good performances from Ryan Dempster, Sean Gallagher, and Carlos Zambrano in their respective starts. The Cubs are now tied with the Devil Rays (!) for the best record in baseball, and are 1st in the NL in ERA, runs, and batting average. Keep up the good work, Cubs.

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And, as a side note, I decided to check out Google Analytics, which is a pretty damn cool free tool. For really the first time I can confirm that someone else out there reads this, (besides the people running scripts or whatever they are that keep leaving generic, "I like this site! Check out my site!" comments on some of my posts) as Google found at least 1 visitor from Canada, where I'm pretty sure I do not reside.

Friday, May 23, 2008

There Will Be Blood

There Will Be Blood (***1/2)

Drainage! Drainage, Eli, you boy. Drained dry. I'm so sorry. Here, if you have a milkshake, and I have a milkshake, and I have a straw. There it is, that's a straw, you see? You watching?. And my straw reaches acroooooooss the room, and starts to drink your milkshake... I... drink... your... milkshake! I drink it up!

There Will be Blood is a film that doesn't pull any punches, and frankly, to work within the same analogy, I think it keeps punching after the ref has already called for the bell. It's a gritty, bleak, nihilistic, character study of a character who seems to literally have no redeeming qualities (besides, perhaps a penchant for coming up with clever witticisms whilst verbally thrashing someone). As this essay from Alternate Takes describes more eloquently then I'll attempt to, even though the movie is a period piece and takes place over the course of almost 30 years, it doesn't really feel like an epic in that it doesn't really seem to have any grand revelations regarding the turn of the century oil industry, save the fact that a lot of people involved in it were extremely greedy. That's not to say that the movie isn't entertaining, because it is, in large part because of what Daniel Day Lewis does with his performance that, deservedly, won him an Oscar.

The film opens in 1898, with the aforementioned protagonist, Daniel Plainview, covered in soot working by himself to mine for gold and silver. The film then jumps four years ahead, where Plainview is now part of a small team working on a single oil derrick. When one of the workers is killed in an accident, Plainview takes his infant son and claims him as his own. This entire sequence probably lasts around 15 minutes and contains no dialogue whatsoever. During these scenes, the movie's score, composed by one of the members of Radiohead, begins with a grating dissonance that will continue throughout music of the film. It's the sort of music I imagine plays in Daniel Plainfield's mind constantly. The surrealist music, combined with the silent characters, and the numerous wide shots of a vast, empty, desert reminded me more of something like 2001 than any other turn of the century period piece.

After the scene in 1902, there is another time skip to 1911, a year in which the film settles in for most of its remainder. Daniel now travels throughout California with his sort-of-adopted son, H.W., giving the same sales pitch, in which he explains that he's not a contractor or a middleman, but has garnered success in the oil business because of his own individual efforts at the oil derricks: "When I say I'm an oil man, you'll agree." One night he is visited by Paul, a young man from a ranch in the middle of nowhere who claims that he's seen oil flowing up to the surface there. Plainview pays Paul for the tip, but not without threatening to do bad things to him if he's lying. Fortunately for Paul, Daniel and H.W. are able to confirm the truth of what he says, which they do by posing as quail hunters passing through the area. Plainview offers to buy the ranch from its old, world-weary owner, who is all to eager to sell the ranch, which produces nothing save a meager offering of potatoes.

A wrench is thrown in Daniel's plans, however, as Eli, son of the ranch owner and twin brother of Paul, announces that he's aware of the oil as well and warns his father of underestimating its value. A temporary truce is reached as Daniel increases his offer for the land, and throws in more money for Eli to use to build a church. Eli is in many ways the opposite of Plainview. Once he founds his church, Eli becomes a fiery faith-healer, while Plainview is an unabashed atheist, at times seemingly because he wishes he were God himself. Eli seems to be always looking for the larger meaning in something, while Plainview's focus is always "how do I make money, and how do I make it quickly?"

There are other events of all sorts as the film goes on that test Daniel's relationship with his son and, sometimes it seems, his very sanity. As time goes on, his business actually continues to blossom, though we never see him relish in his prosperity, instead seeing only his battles with his personal demons. While his emotional outbursts are some of the most overt you'll ever see in a movie, it is often times difficult to pinpoint exactly what makes the character tick. He admits openly that he detests most people, and seems to shy away from any close relationships that aren't for purposes of business, and yet simultaneously seems very concerned with how he is perceived by others.

Watching the character's self-destruction is incredibly gripping to watch because of how well Daniel Day Lewis embodies the character but, as I said before, it sometimes seems hard to tell what Paul Thomas Anderson wants us to take away from it all. At times, Daniel Plainview, a character which has been meticulously constructed to represent the ultimate level of contemptuousness and nihilism, doesn't seem to exist for a specific purpose, but merely seems to exist. Additionally, while I appreciate the bleak tone set by the score, which is often times allowed to take center stage as the characters remain quiet, I think the film requires you to pick up a little too much simply from context clues and brief glimpses. I like a film that's challenging, but not one that just feels like a chore to watch and understand. Like No Country for Old Men, this may be a film that requires more than one viewing to really "get" fully, but as of right now I'm calling this a not fully realized vision. We'll see.

P.S. I drink your mikshake. I drink it up.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Keep Rollin' Along

Roughly 1/4 of the way through the season, the Cubs find themselves 10 games over .500 (they were 8 games over .500 for all of 2007), in first place in the NL central, and leading the NL in batting average and on-base percentage. After winning 3 of 4 against a fairly awful Padres team, the Cubs won 2 of 3 over the weekend against another bad (though recently hot) Pirates team. Both series were played at Wrigley. The question then becomes, can the Cubs keep going at this pace (if I do the math right, they're on pace to go 99-63) for the entire season, or is this record a by-product of the fact that they've played 27 of 44 games at home, 9 games against the Pirates, and 6 against the Reds? The series that starts tonight may help to answer that question, as the Cubs head down to Houston to play the Astros. Unlike the Cubs, the Astros have spent the bulk of the first 2 months of the '08 season on the road, and even though they don't appear to be as good as the Cubs on paper, their record is only 2 1/2 games worse. They're read hot at the moment, going 12-4 thus far in May. Lance Berkman is quietly (at least I haven't seen him getting that much national attention) hitting .399 with 16 HRs and 44 RBIs, which puts him extremely close to being the NL leader in all 3 triple crown stats (Chipper Jones' .410 average beats him there). Again though, the Cubs would seem to be clearly better on paper, and so a series win in Houston to assert this fact might go a long way.

Concerns about Alfonso Soriano have quieted lately, as Soriano has hit nearly .400 since coming back, is now tied for the team lead in home runs with 10, and managed to put together a 5-for-5, 2 home run performance in a LOSS on Saturday. While I have been and remain critical of Soriano's patience at the plate and still don't want him leading off, its clear that the negative sentiment piled onto him earlier in the year was overblown.

Kerry Wood picked up his 10th save yesterday, and has now appeared in 22 games, equal to the amount of games he appeared in last year. It's good to see Kerry be able to stay on the field, and be fairly effective at the same time.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Dust off the brooms

After suffering through a 4-9 stretch, the Cubs got themselves right in a big way this weekend with a sweep, and against the Diamondbacks, who hold the best record in the NL, no less. In the process they got good outings from Ted Lilly and Ryan Dempster and a decent outing from Sean Gallagher, who pitched in place of Carlos Zambrano on Sunday because of the rain delayed start. Gallagher will apparently be moved to the rotation in place of Jon Lieber, who got absolutely rocked against the Reds last week, allowing 4 home runs in one inning, and lasting just 2 innings total. I suspect, however, that Rich Hill will be called back up before too long, as he has pitched well in his first 2 starts at AAA. Alfonso Soriano may be starting to heat up again after a 4-for-5 performance on Saturday, a game which also saw Kosuke Fukudome pick up his 2nd homer. Scott Eyre also made his '08 debut in the majors after a bunch of rehab outings, and managed to pick up the win pitching a scoreless inning.

There are a couple of things to still be concerned about. The Cubs are still running themselves out of some innings, notably on Saturday when they had two runners called out at the plate.
In one case, Reed Johnson was tagging up on a fly ball to right and was thrown out by an absolutely perfect throw from Justin Upton. With a lot of right fielders, that probably would've been a good send. Less forgivable was a gaffe by a Aramis Ramirez, who was on third when a ball was hit to short, held up initially, but then tried to make it towards home and was thrown out easily after the put-out was made at first. Failing to commit one way or the other on baserunning plays is something that has gotten the Cubs in trouble on a few occasions in recent years, and Aramis individually has not been known as a fantastic baserunner. It would be nice to see this corrected, but as long Aramis and others are swinging the bat as they are, they'll likely usually make up for it.

After a fantastic start, Reed Johnson has come back to earth somewhat, (though he hit his first home run of the year yesterday in the form of a 2-run shot that tied the game 4-4) and is now hitting .255 with an OPS of .662. Johnson has been playing almost everyday, and I think its time to start playing Felix Pie consistently against rightys and save Johnson for leftys. Pie's stats aren't anything to write home about currently, but he's currently not getting enough at-bats to get better. If Lou doesn't feel comfortable playing him more than he is now, I think he has to be sent back down to AAA where he can start every day. Next up is a 4 game set against the Padres, who have been abysmal as of late, showing almost no offense to speak of. Barring some unforeseen incident, Greg Maddux will start Thursday's game after winning his 350th career game in his last start.

Update:

Okay, the Padres offense is actually worse than I first thought it was. They're last in the league in runs, and by a pretty good margin, as well as last in average, OBP, and slugging.


StatCubsPadres
Runs5.703.37
Avg.281.231
OBP.371.305
Slg.438.345

Saturday, May 03, 2008

Frustration

The Cubs have run into a rough patch, losing 6 of their last 8. What's frustrating is that none of the losses have come by margins of more than 3 runs, whereas the wins were in games with scores of 7-0 and 19-5. Overall on the season, the Cubs have an expected win-loss record of 19-10, 2 games better than in actuality. The Cubs have been getting double-digit hit totals and drawing walks consistently, the difference, for the most part, is that they've been stranding runners on base in their losses.

The big story recently has been the return of Alfonso Soriano, who has not looked comfortable to say the least. Soriano couldn't get to a catchable fly ball in the series finale against the Brewers on Thursday which was part of a 9th inning Kerry Wood blown save, and then badly misplayed two balls in the same inning last night in St. Louis. He was hitless since returning until the 9th inning last night where he hit a game-tying home run off of Jason Isringhausen, which probably at least partially spared him from the wrath of the fans, which was already brewing on the sports radio airwaves after Thursdays game. Bob Brenley, whose criticisms of the team are usually pretty subtle, obviously thought Soriano had no business out there and criticized the team for not giving him some rehab starts in the minors. It'll be interesting to see if he's in the lineup today and if he gets subbed for defense late in the game if the Cubs are leading.

Despite Soriano's game tying home run, the Cubs lost 5-3 in 11 innings. The bullpen had to work 10 1/3 innings itself, as Pinella pulled Rich Hill after just 6 batters, 4 of which he walked. Taking the loss was Chad Fox, who pitched the 10th and 11th in his first appearance since he walked off the field in 2005 and was forced to undergo his 2nd Tommy John's operation. He was called up yesterday in favor of Kevin Hart, who wasn't exactly lights out, but, frankly, is probably better than Fox at this point in his career. Even in the 10th, Fox looked somewhat shaky. It was a 1-2-3 inning, but all three outs were on fairly deep fly balls to center. Fox making it back to the big leagues is a nice story, I guess, but I really don't see what he can do to help the team at this point. I don't know why he's a better option than Neal Cotts, who has a sub-2.00 ERA at AAA right now, and 28 is not going to get much of any benefit from remaining in the minors as far as development goes. Cotts would seem to be the logical option even moreso because the Cubs are currently carrying only left-hander in the form of Sean Marshall, although Scott Eyre is rehabbing as well and may return soon.

Ted Lilly takes the mound this afternoon in St. Louis, and needs to try and pitch deep into the game with a tired bullpen.

Update: So apparently Rich Hill got sent down to AAA and Sean Gallagher brought up.

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Win Some, Lose Some

The Cubs won 3 more in a row after my last post to get to 15-6. That start is the best since 1907 or something like that for the Cubs. Along the way they also had a streak of winning 4 games in a row by 6 runs or more, which is the first time they've done that since 18-something (can't even remember what year it was according to Len Kasper). So dropping the next two to the Rockies and Nationals in close games certainly is not cause for panic, but wow, have they been frustrating nonetheless. Both games saw the Cubs strand a ton of runners. They didn't ground into many double plays or strike out a lot, they just didn't seem to get the timely hit as they have so often early on. Last night the Nationals won in walkoff fashion on a home-run by catcher Will Nieves off of Bob Howry. It was Nieves's first career home run on a ball that he reached way out of the zone to get and pulled it down the right field line. I have no idea what's going on with Howry. He's not looking comfortable at all right now. Howry's performance is one thing that worries me at the moment, as I don't think Wuertz or Hart could really excel in a set-up role, and I really don't want Carlos Marmol's arm to fall off from throwing 30 pitches a night. As I said though, it's only a 2 game skid at the moment, and with Carlos Zambrano facing a fairly awful Nationals offense tonight, you would certainly figure the odds to be in the Cubs' favor.

Monday, April 21, 2008

White Flag Time


Things have been going pretty well for the Cubs. They're currently sitting pretty at 12-6 after sweeping the Pirates for the second time this year, and are now in 1st place in the NL Central and a half game ahead of the Cardinals. This marks a huge shift from the way the Cubs started last year, when they were a mere 7-11 after their first 18 games and didn't get to 12 wins until May 2nd. They've also scored 28 more runs, drawn 31 more walks, and hit 7 more home runs in the first 18 games of this season as compared to last season. All of that is good enough for 1st in the NL in both average and OBP (all this is according to baseball-reference.com, as usual) The last couple of series against the Reds and Pirates have been particularly good for the Cubs' offense, as they've scored 9+ runs in 4 of the 6 games, despite Alphonso Soriano being played on the DL after the first game against the Reds.

Some people might be quick to dismiss the early success, because it's been mostly against bad teams (the Cubs have played the Brewers and Phillies, but are just 2-4 against them), but Cubs sweeps have been pretty rare in recent years against any team, and already sweeping the Pirates twice this year is extremely encouraging to me.

I was in attendance for the game on Wednesday against the Reds. I didn't get there until the game was already in the 3rd inning because I didn't leave until 6:00 and I-88 was packed and Josh Fogg was already being pulled from the game. Cubs ended up winning 12-3 on a gorgeous night. It was good times.

Update (4/22 ~2:00ish)

The Cubs kept the winning streak going last night, beating the Mets 7-1, getting 5 of their runs in the 8th inning, capitalizing off of a Jose Reyes error which began the inning. After loading the bases with no outs, Mark DeRosa struck out, and Geovany Soto popped out, seemingly setting up a huge wasted opportunity that were oh so common during the Dusty Baker era. But, lo and behond, Ronny Cedeno worked an at-bat that was something like 9 or 10 pitches before finally punching a single up the middle, then Felix Pie hit a 3-run pinch-hit home run. When things are going right, they're going right. Cedeno and Pie were two guys who weren't even guaranteed to be on the roster at the start of the year. Right now as I'm posting the Cubs are wrapping up the brief 2-game set with an afternoon game. Ted Lilly retired the first 9 guys in order, but has run into trouble in the 4th. It might end up being a repeat of his last start, where he looked much improved from the outset but then got roughed up the second time through the order. Let's hope not. 0-0 score for now...

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Let's not play two, but play a really long one

I was visiting people I know who are still at college last weekend, so again I've left this idle for a few days. Basically, the Cubs swept the Pirates in an odd series that had 36 innings in 3 games, and then narrowly avoided a sweep at the hands of the Phillies, putting them at 7-5. Their hitting has still be fairly good, with Derrek Lee mostly notably on a tear, but the pitching has been very inconsistent. Ted Lilly has yet to last 5 innings in a start and doesn't look like the same guy as in 2007 thus far. The bullpen has struggled as well, especially Bob Howry. It doesn't help that, as I alluded to, they've had to pitch a ton of innings. 4 of the Cubs' first 12 games have gone into extra innings. Random fact of the day (courtesy of the super cool Play Index feature at Baseball Reference): the most extra inning games the Cubs have played in a season is 23 in 1992. Right now they're on pace for 54. A lot of the games thus far have had some very bizarre moments, and a lot o them-- certainly the 4 extra inning games-- could've had a different result with the change of only one or two plays. As such, it's hard to really get a read on the team thus far.

One thing I will say thus far that I think could potentially get the Cubs in a lot of trouble is Lou Pinella's penchant for announcing a batter, knowing the opposing manager will change pitchers to make it lefty-lefty or righty-righty, then pulling him back and announcing another batter who hits with the opposite hand. This effectively wastes the first batter in said sequence, since you're technically "in the game" as soon as you're announced. With the extra innings games early on, this has led to the Cubs running out of position players on more than one occasion, and as such, the likes of Carlos Zambrano have been batting in key situations. A notable example was Sunday, where in the 10th inning against the Phillies, there were runners on 1st and 2nd with 1 out with Zambrano hitting because the bench was already empty. Zambrano grounded to short, and it should have been an inning ending double-play, but Chase Utley made a horrible throw to first and the go-ahead run ended up scoring. While the Cubs ended up getting a break in that case, in about 99 out of 100 times, that play is going to be a double play, and while Zambrano is certainly a good hitter by pitcher standards, he's not who you want batting in a tie game late.

I get the mentality Lou is using: if you have your best hitter batting in the 7th or 8th, or whenever it is, there's a better chance that he can give you lead and you can close the game out in 9 innings and not have to worry about anything coming afterward. I feel however, that its more worth it to keep a hitter in the batter's box in a lefty-lefty or righty-righty situation-- even though he may be hitting like .250 vs. leftys as opposed to .280 vs. righties or vice vera-- than have a pitcher taking goofy looking hacks at the ball later on. There's probably a way to prove or disprove this statistically, but I'm not going to exert the effort to try and find out.

Cubs play the Reds (reunion with Dusty!) later on tonight at Wrigley.