DeRo

The Cubs have won their last 8 series, and are now 30 games over .500 for what I'm pretty sure is the first time in my lifetime. Rich Harden won the rubber match against the Nationals yesterday, going 7 IP, allowing only 2 hits and picking up 11 Ks. Over his past 3 starts, Harden's allowed six hits TOTAL for a fairly ridiculous BAA (batting avg. against) of .097. Mark DeRosa has all of a sudden shown some power, homering in each of his last 4 games to give him 18 on the year. He now has 77 RBIs on the year, which is already over his career high and he might have a very outside shot at 100+ by year's end. DeRosa's 77 puts him 2nd in team leaders for RBI behind Aramis Ramirez's (91), and he's sort of become the, if not unsung, then "least-sung" hero of the team, especially with the continued struggles of Kosuke Fukudome. DeRosa's done what he has at the plate while playing 5 different positions in the field at least once during the season. I imagine the list of 100+ RBI players having played 5 different positions is pretty short. Also key to the team's recent success has been Jeff Samardzija, who continues to be used as a middle-to-late-innings guy with tremendous success. In fact, as I just discovered while messing around, as of right now the lowest ERA amongst Cubs first-year players with at least 15 IP is one Jeff Samardzija at 1.06 (source: Baseball Reference PI) There's probably going to be a lot of team history set this year.

Deep Thoughts Concerning Fantasy Football & D&D

Since its creation, Dungeons & Dragons has always sort of been perceived as something that has to be contained within its own little niche of acne-ridden, socially awkward guys playing in their parents' basement. Meanwhile, as it deals with the toughest and smash-mouthyest of all sports, fantasy football has always been a perfectly acceptable "everyman" activity. A bunch of guys sitting around drinking beer glued to ESPN News to see if the running back on their bench has been upgraded from Questionable to Probable yet doesn't really seem out of place at all. A fantasy football pool is almost a requisite for any guy with an office job to better bond with his fellow co-workers, whereas the idea of an inter-office D&D session is a preposterous notion.

I've actually dabbled in both D&D and fantasy football, and I think I'm in a tiny minority in that, for the most part, I enjoy doing both. Last night I stayed after work along with the 9 other guys in our office league for our live fantasy draft. I'm not sure exactly when it hit me. Perhaps it was upon the commissioner firing up the $30 draft software on his laptop--complete with a countdown clock for each pick--and projecting it on the screen in the meeting room we were in, or perhaps it was when I was watching a guy frantically switch between his complete 32-team depth chart sheet and his stat projections sheet, but at some point I realized that, once you reach a certain level of devotion, D&D players and fantasy football players are really pretty much indistinguishable. The only difference is that fantasy football is inherently tied to football. Never mind the fact that no actual football gets played amongst the participants.

I think I'm kicked out of the Man-law Council now, or whatever it was called in those Bud Light commercials with Burt Reynolds and HHH.

---------------------------------

Also, apparently in recent weeks Michael Goldfarb, a McCain campaign surrogate, has been making references to the "pro-Obama Dungeons & Dragons crowd" for reasons unbeknown to me. Since when is the die-hard D&D player demographic like a key part of Obama's constituency?

When You're Hot, You're Hot

When I last blogged about the Cubs they were in the midst of a 4 game series with the Brewers which they entered holding a 1 game lead in the division. As such, something of a mini-panic had seemed to be brewing amongst the more pessimistic portions of the fan base. All that has changed completely since the, as the Cubs swept the Brewers, won 2 of 3 in each of three series against the Pirates, Astros, and Cardinals, swept the Braves, and just tonight took game 1 against the Marlins on a Daryle Ward 3-run home run in the 9th. The hit was Ward's first in his last 14 at bats, one of many things that seems to have fallen in place in just the right way for the Cubs lately. Tonight's win was the 75th for the Cubs on the year. To put that in perspective, last year the Cubs won their 75th game on September 13th, in their 146th game of the year (this game aginst the Marlins was the 122nd for this year's Cubs).

Jeff Samardzija has allowed just 2 runs in his first 13 2/3 IP in the bigs, and will set up an interesting decision when Jon Lieber comes back from off of the DL (he's begun rehabbing in the minors). Lou has shown no hesitation in using Samardzija in close and late situations, and certainly seems to be set on using him for the duration of the season, and maybe even into the playoffs. Right now the weak link in the bullpen would probably be Bob Howry, whose ERA has risen to 5.53, and really has not seemed to have good stuff all year (he's allowed 12 HRs, which is one more than Ryan Dempster has in three times the amount of innings). I'm not sure if they'ed designate Howry for assignment having already DFA'd Scott Eyre, who they signed for big money the same year Howry joined the team. It's possible that they'll hold Lieber out until September 1st when the rosters expand, thus avoiding the entire headache. There's really no reason to rush Lieber back anyway, as outside of Howry the bullpen has been tremendous. At any rate, if these decisions are the most painful the Cubs are going to have to make down the stretch run, it's going to be a very fun end to the season. 100 wins is looking more and more like a real possibility and not a pipe dream.

[Venture Brothers] The Last Three Episodes

Yeah, I'm really behind on this. Let's try and fix that. Because I'm really late in writing these, this is going to make heavy use of the capsules from Mantis Eye Experiment, which is a fantastic site you should check out for all things Venture Bros.

Season 3, Episode 8: Tears of a Seacow

Once again, this episode wasn't very Venture-centric--and really the whole season has turned out to be relatively lacking in Rusty, the boys, and Brock in comparison to seasons 1 & 2--but "Tears of a Sea Cow" pretty much matches "What Comes Down, Must Come Up" just in terms of purely how funny it is. The beginning with Dr. Duodong was just inspired.

Episode rating: Like killing clean, not letting dames get in the way

Favorite Bits\Random Thoughts:

-The Monarch not at all impressed by Dr. Duodong's secret lair. "I'm absolutely terrified of your prop from an old Styx video!"

-"Give us the... cuddlefish... I can't do this."

-The Monarch, 21, and 24 reading Dean's newspaper. "This D. Viceroy guy is probably fictitious, or... one of you guys."

-The Murderous Moppets now going around as "The Pupae Twins" to fit in with the butterfly theme.

-21's whole "Highlander" exchange with Hank. "I've personally seen you die TWICE. I'm talking like, shotgun to the face!"

Season 3, Episode 9: Now Museum, Now You Don't

Firstly, amazing episode title. This episode took place entirely on Spider Skull Island, which Jonas Jr. is turning into a museum dedicated to his father. It took care of a whole bunch of story, including what's become of Richard Impossible (he's an alcoholic deadbeat), what the former ghost pirates are up to (wishing they were ghost pirates again), and how Rusty feels about Jonas Jr (still hates him). Even though it takes place entirely in one spot there's a lot going on and it feels pretty rushed. They still managed to fit some funny material in though.

Episode rating: Like when the Monarch Mobile looks like someone took it to Magic Mountain and did that Spin Art thing on it.

-The old Bond movie style opening with Jonas Venture infiltrating the Fraternity of Torment in an absoutlely awful Chinese guy disguise.

-I love the idea of the old heroes and villains signing autographs next to each other.

-Colonel Gentlemen's alive! I love his story of eating mallomars with a "Yoohoo chaser" until he goes into a coma.

-The pirate captain asking Richard "Fess up, you were just tryin' to kill yourself weren't ya?" Great ending.

Season 3, Episode 10: The Lepidopterists

For what its worth, from Wikipedia:

A lepidopterist is a person who catches and collects, studies, or simply observes (see butterfly watching) lepidopterans

Anyway, this was a great episode, a nice change of pace from "Now Museum, Now You Don't" not that it wasn't funny, but I thought it got a little too hung up in all the different character development stuff it was trying to tackle at once. This felt a little more like an episode that held up on its own.

Episode rating: Like having a Tekken 3 machine in the lounge

Favorite Bits/Random Thoughts:

-The whole sequence with Jonas Jr. and team forming the Voltron-type robot was brilliant. Reminded me a lot of the Mecha-Shiva scene from season 1. "It looks like a robot with an ice cream cone for one of its arms!" I loved Ned's constant interruptions as The Monarch tries to get into a dramatic exchange with Jonas. "Butterflies! Pretty!"

-"Poor Ned has three inches of skin. How do you think that makes him feel?"
"I dunno, itchy?"

-"Me and my associates here are amateur lepidopterists."
"You... wanna see my stamp collection?"

-Gotta love 21 and 24 referencing Tomb Raider

I'm still wating for one big Brock ass-kicking scene this season. Season 3 has given me a lot, but I need to see Brock flipping out and killing people.

Playoff preview?

I've neglected to make a Cubs post for almost three weeks now, and they've been a pretty eventful three weeks, so let's try and recap some of what's been happening. Firstly, the Cubs sit at 62-44, having struggled out of the gate after the All-Star break (they're 5-6 since then). Really, I don't think the slump quite warranted the panic that was ensuing from some fans, but it didn't help that the Brewers had gotten read hot during the same period of time, and actually spent a day tied with the Cubs for first. While the Cubs are still 1st in the NL in runs, BA and OBP, their bats--most notably Derrek Lee (.245 avg, 2 HR), and Aramis Ramirez (.156 avg., 1 HR)--have been relatively quiet since the break. That trend may now be turning around in a big way, however, as the Cubs have won their last two in the form of a come from behind 9-6 win over the Marlins, and a 6-4 victory at Milwaukee, the latter being the first loss for C.C. Sabathia as a Brewer.

Kerry Wood has been on the DL with a lingering blister issue. The fact that its not one of his recurring structural issues in his arm is obviously very good news, although, in a way, the fact that its a rather mundane injury makes me as a fan even more anxious for him to get back on the field. Roughly at the same time of Wood's injury, Carlos Marmol started a stretch in which he got absolutely rocked, and is currently looking at a 6.35 ERA for July (it was bad in June as well, after his ERA was under 2.00 in both April and May). Pinella's use of Marmol has been truly baffling at times, and is one of the few things I feel can be raised as a major complaint in regards to his managing. Marmol's on pace for almost 90 innings on the year. Yes, it's a fact that sometimes when you're in a pennant race and your team has a chance to win in just about every game, you have to keep running your best guys out there. There have been times, however, when Pinella has used Marmol in a game on no days rest when the Cubs have a lead of at least 4 or 5 runs and when there are other, more rested pitchers in the bullpen. Not everyone in the bullpen is lights out, but overall its good enough such that Lou should be able to feel that he can go to someone else in that situation. Lou does seem to put a lot of trust in Chad Gaudin, and his ERA is an excellent 1.69 since joining the Cubs, so its possible that his presence in the 'pen will give Marmol a break as we come down the stretch.

Jeff Samardzija made his major league debut last Friday against the Marlins, and then went two more innings on Sunday--a game that followed a 12 inning loss that wore down the bullpen--to get his first major league save. He already has 5 strikeouts in 4 innings and looks as if he has absolutely filthy stuff. He was throwing at 97 right out of the gate on Friday. Down the road he could have all the makings of a great back-end bullpen guy, although he may eventually be a starter as was his role in the minors.

As I mentioned earlier, the Cubs beat the Brewers last night 6-4, and in doing so took the first of four games at Miller Park in what is a crucial series. The Cubs currently hold a two game lead and therefore can guarantee that they'll remain first after this series is over with one more win. Tonight is going to be one of the best pitching matchups of the year: Carlos Zambrano vs. Ben Sheets.

Tale of the tape:

	W	L	ERA	WHIP	K
Carlos Zambrano	11	4	2.96	1.24	87
Ben Sheets	10	3	2.87	1.13	115

As per normal, all stats come from Baseball Reference.

The Dark Knight

The Dark Knight (****)

The Dark Knight is the best superhero movie ever made, surpassing its already excellent predecessor Batman Begins in just about every way. Its a movie that will be foremost remembered (with good reason) as Heath Ledger's final, and maybe best, performance before his death due to an accidental overdose. Ledger's performance, however, while every bit deserving of the attention its received, is but one aspect of a film that is all-around amazing and features great performances from just about everyone in its ensemble cast. As he did with Batman Begins, director Christopher Nolan uses on-location filming in Chicago to create a fantastic vision of Gotham City, dark and imposing enough to provide a suitable backdrop for Batman's crime fighting, but less abstract and expressionist than Tim Burton's Gotham. The story, however, is what really drives the film. With the origin story already told, Christopher Nolan, and his brother and co-writer Johnathan utilize Batman's ultimate nemesis and the ultimate tragic figure of Batman lore, and weave them into one deeply resonant storyline that reflects everything that Batman's always been about, while also exploring brand new facets of Batman's world.

After we catch a brief glimpse of the Joker during a heist of a mob-controlled bank, our first good look at the Joker comes when he shows up at a meeting of the same mobsters that he just stole from. The composition of the scene isn't all that dissimilar from the scene in which Jack Nicholson first appears as the Joker in Tim Burton's Batman and eventually burns a guy down to a charred skeleton with his variation on a novelty hand buzzer. When Heath Ledger enters as the Joker in The Dark Knight, he does his own "magic trick" of sorts that still has a bit of the macabre, "the joke's on you buddy!" sort of feeling that encapsulates what the Joker is all about, but at the same time is much more jarring and much more disturbing in its realism. As with the Jack Nicholson scene, one of the gangsters gathers around the table points out the obvious and says, "You're crazy." In Tim Burton's movie, Nicholson retorts with "Haven't you ever heard of the healing power of laughter? (cackles)." In Nolan's Dark Knight, the Joker give a harsh glare and replies "No, I'm not," in a voice that seems as though he's trying to convince himself of that fact as much as he's declaring it to anyone else. This scene is probably the best example of the genius of Heath Leger's performance. He keeps just enough of the essence of the Joker there, but gives him a whole new depth that isn't really in the comics at all.'

Even though two of the Joker's big trademarks are his cackling laugh and his incessant disturbingly black comedy, a lot of what Leger does in his performance is more subtle and non-verbal. When he crashes Bruce Wayne's party and spots Rachel Dawes (now played by Maggie Gyllinhall, who is a big step up from Katie Holmes) he remarks "Why hello beautiful!" and starts awkwardly parting his messy, matted hair and feeling his tongue around his mouth. The image of this is far creepier than any weird joke the Joker could've told in the scene. I don't think its hyperbole to say that Ledger's joker is going to be remembered the same way Anthony Hopkins is for Hannibal Lecter or, the other Joker, Jack Nicholson for what he did in The Shining.

To focus only on the Joker, though, is to ignore the rest of the performances, all of which are pretty much exactly what I'd want them to be. Aaron Eckhart's towheaded Harvey Dent doesn't really resemble how he's usually portrayed in the comics, but he plays the character with a hard to describe combination of a sort of stoic resolve but with a boyish charm on top of it that makes the tragic turn of the character that much more powerful when it happens, even though you're already expecting it if you're already indoctrinated in Batman lore. In their script, Nolan and his brother give him some powerful lines that make the character both more endearing and more meaningful than the over-the-top campy portrayal by Tommy Lee Jones in the god-awful Batman Forever. While a lot of the Joker's scenes were distributed liberally as the movie was being promoted, the studio did a damn good job of keeping the specifics of Harvey Dent's fate tightly under wraps, and as his part of the film's climax plays out his character is shockingly brutal in the best possible way.

Batman himself is more introspective in this second leg of the series, and actually has to be propped up by Alfred, (again played by Michael Caine) as the relative order he brought to the city begins to deteriorate as the Joker wreaks havoc. The idea of "escalation" between Batman and the Rogue's Gallery that he inspires originally brought up by Jim Gordon at the end of Begins continues in Dark Knight in full force. The movie also plays with the idea of a fatalism existing between Batman and the Joker, because Batman can never kill the Joker because of who he's trying to be and the Joker can never be reformed or controlled.

Even if you don't care about extracting big ideas from a superhero movie and just want to watch a superhero do superhero type stuff, you'll likely still find the The Dark Knight near perfect. The benefit of the on-location filming in Chicago is once again obvious to see, and the action sequences trump the best of those in Batman Begins. This is a masterpiece of the genre.

Hellboy II

Hellboy II (***1/2)

Writing this just over 24 hours before I plan on seeing The Dark Knight [yeah, it took me a while get around to finishing it], its sort of difficult to constrain my fanboyish hype long enough to think about any other movie, except in terms of how much less badass I'm anticipating it being in comparison to The Dark Knight. Nevertheless, I did see Hellboy II last weekend, and even though the timing of its release means its pretty much destined to be overshadowed, its a very good comic book movie in its own right. Like the original Hellboy film--which wasn't perfect and had some pacing and plothole issues, but was a movie that I nevertheless felt was underrated--the sequel was helmed by Guillermo Del Toro, who (very much deservedly) gained mainstream praise for his dark fantasy epic Pan's Labyrinth. Visually, this film is much closer to what Del Toro did in Pan's, and dark, fantastical, brooding atmosphere is one of its strongest points.

If you didn't see the first Hellboy movie and aren't familiar with the premise, here's the Cliff's Notes version: There's a secret government agency called the Bureau for Paranormal Research and Defense (BPRD) that gets called in any time something shows up that looks too much like something out of an H.P. Lovecraft book for the normal feds to deal with. Its agents include Hellboy. a demon that was summoned through a portal into our world by Nazis during World War II, Abe Sapien, a "mer-man" type guy who can intuit stuff about people and objects by waving his hands around, and Liz, who can set stuff on fire though not always control it that well. This second iteration expands greatly upon the mythos of the series, introducing an entire underworld of elves, trolls, and other races that you may have encountered with your World of Warcraft character. As I said earlier, the visuals are the film's strength, and there are no better visuals in the film than the throne room of the elves, which kind of looks like Lothlorien from Lord of the Rings if it was crammed entirely within a sewer. There's also a troll market hidden away underneath a New York City bridge, that Roger Ebert beats me to the punch in comparing to Mos Eisley from the first Star Wars.

The villain is the prince of the elves, who's been alive for as long as mankind has existed and is pissed off at our penchant for clearing down forests to make way for strip malls. His plan for revenge involves the Golden Army, a legion of mechanical warriors created for his father the king thousands of years ago before the elves were exiled to the forest. The story of the army's creation is told in the form of a bedtime story that was told to Hellboy growing up and represented through stop motion animation with old world-looking wooden puppets. Back in the present, the prince is attempting to collect all the pieces of the crown that allows its bearer to command the Golden Army which have been scattered between the human and elven worlds as part of the truce that ended the war in ancient times.

Plots like that of Hellboy II are pretty much a dime a dozen in the realms of fantasy and science fiction. Aside from the visuals, what sets this movie apart is its wit, which is no more readily apparent in Ron Pearlman's performance as Hellboy. The appeal of Hellboy as a character is that he's not the stoic, emotionless figure you'd expect an otherworldly being to be, but rather a grumpy blue-collar guy who doesn't like work because it cuts into his drinking time. Ron Perlman encapsulates this perfectly. The voice of Abe has been switched from David Hyde Pearce to Doug Jones (who does the rest of Abe), which is fine with me because Jones seems much more into the part, whereas I imagine David Hyde Pierce opining about how he wishes Frasier didn't get canceled while in the recording studio. Abe has more to do in this movie, and seems more like a character on equal footing with Hellboy, rather than the bumbling sidekick. Added to the cast is an odd German scientist, voiced in the most stereotypical and exaggerated of accents possible by Seth McFarlane for Family Guy fame. The character is a little too cartoony, but does provide a great foil for Hellboy for some great comic relief.

As I said, Hellboy II's plot is somewhat derivative, and the ending may be something you see coming from midway through the movie, but the charm of Hellboy as a character is still there. Add to it Guillermo Del Toro's more Pan Labyirinth-esque visuals and some actually decent, not hit-you-over-the-head obvious social commentary, and you have a pretty good comic book movie. It's just not The Dark Knight.

This is a Sneaking Mission

Disclaimer: While I'm not going to walk through the entire plot of the game, this is probably going to have spoilers.

Despite the fact that I have Aeris and Kilik in the title image for this blog, I haven't really discussed video games at all here. I figure Metal Gear Solid 4, which I got about two weeks ago along with a Playstation 3 (the first system I've owned from this generation) is as good an opportunity as any to change that fact. There's a lot to talk about with regard to MGS4, party because there's a lot packed into the same, and party because the game has gotten a near preposterous amount of hype (IGN broke out the rarely seen 10.0 for the game, although they 10'd Grand Theft Auto 4 as well, so maybe their standards are just lower now), a lot of which I believe is deserved, though perhaps not all of it. While the game in many ways should be considered the new benchmark for what a video game can be, I certainly don't see it as having achieved perfection, and really, I'm not even 100% convinced yet that this is the best game of the series from purely a gameplay perspective.

It's impossible to explain what the Metal Gear Solid series is all about to someone who has never played it mainly because, well, its sometimes near-impossible to explain everything that's going on, period. And while MGS4 eventually more or less ties up most of the loose ends, there's still more a few moments throughout the game that'll have you saying "yeahbuhwhaa?" I've always found the basic premise interesting, and now that the 4th game in the series deals heavily with PMCs (like the real-life and somewhat infamous Blackwater) it seems a little more poignant now. Anyway, the overarching story of Metal Gear Solid, which stretches from the mid '60s to the near future, concerns the Patriots, the Illuminati like organization that controls all of world affairs through a complex system of AIs. MGS4 finally reveals who the Patriots are and how they came to be, and for the most part explains how the previously disjointed installments of the series are actually all interconnected. There's still a lot of heavy-handed melodrama, and sometimes the not-all-that-clever symbolism (expect to see the Garden of Eden alluded to in some way about a hundred times) gets out of control, but on the whole from a story perspective MGS4 is a satisfying conclusion.

A big reason why the story can succeed, despite a script that's less than stellar at times, is how amazing well done the presentation of the story is. Every cutscene in the game uses the in-game engine and they all look absolutely gorgeous. At any point during a cutscene, pressing up on the D-Pad and moving the analog around will allow you to zoom in anywhere. You zoom in on any characters face as they're speaking, and it will barely affect your suspension of disbelief. The textures still look almost flawless, characters each have their own mannerisms which don't look jerky or fake at all, and there's none of the weird Uncanny Valley stuff that happens sometimes. A criticism of the MGS series has always been that there are too many cutscenes and too often (I would certainly agree for MGS2, not as much for MGS3), and while MGS4 certainly has a lot as well, they're presented in a way such that they're not a chore to sit through at all. My only complaint would be that the cutscenes are pretty heavily back-loaded towards the last 3 of the 5 acts of the game. In the first two acts, the game seems to miss an opportunity to delve more into the circumstances surrounding the local militias, which you encounter fighting the Patriot-controlled PMC grounds. While in the final three acts, even though the story is compelling, the gameplay seems to take too much of a complete back seat.

Elaborating on that point, the first two acts of the game feel very open and unconstrained. It seems like there's always one way to approach a particular situation, be it tranquilizing enemies on sight, or avoiding contact with them all together, or creating some sort of a distraction. The open environments reminded me a lot of the jungles of Metal Gear Solid 3, a game that I had a ridiculous amount of fun playing. The Middle Eastern village and South American base that comprise the settings for the first two acts of MGS4 give the same degree of freedom in terms of how you can plan your route to your destination, only they're even more interactive and detailed. The settings are no less detailed in acts 3, 4, and, 5, but they feel much more on rails and, as I mentioned, they are much more overwhelmed by cutscenes. Act 3 puts you in a European city which is gorgeous to look at, but that you aren't necessarily able to explore because you're tasked with following one particular target. After that sequence there's a whole lot of story, a boss fight, and a chase sequence and that's the entire act. Act 4 returns you to a familiar locale from a previous installment of the series, but, other than another boss fight, pits you only against purely robotic enemies that you're actually rewarded for killing. Act 5 finally, is just sort of a big grand finale that throws the kitchen sink at you but, again, is very on-rails and is extremely short. The way these last 3 acts are set up is the one thing that really bothers me about MGS4.

Even with these fairly minor complaints, MGS4 is a landmark achievement for the PS3 and for Kojima Productions. Thus far I've played through it all the way once on Naked Normal and I'm about 3/4 of the way through a play through on Solid Normal (yeah, the difficulty names are weird). I don't anticipate tiring of playing it any time in the near future.

[Venture Brothers] What Goes Down, Must Come Up

Season 3, Episode 7: What Goes Down, Must Come Up

This is why I watch The Venture Bros. If you read through my reviews of season 3, you'll see that I haven't really disliked any of the episodes thus far, but still it seemed as if there was a certain je ne sais crois missing. I think this episode provided exactly what the season needed. As I said in the "Dr. Quymn" review, I appreciate that they're letting all of the characters grow and not letting them stay stagnant, but at the same time I feel like when they focused a lot of their efforts on this it detracted from the humor. This episode was absolutely hilarious through and through. Jefferson Twilight notably had some incredibly lines.

The episode was also one of the best of the show's many examples of deconstructing the mythos of cold-war era Johnny Quest type adventure shows. In this episode we're treated to a flashback of children on a field trip to see Jonas Venture's underground fallout shelter, only to have MUTHER, the scorned housewife of an A.I. release poison gas throughout the facility, leading to Jonas, The Action Man, Kano, and Colonel Gentlemen promptly rushing to action to save themselves and no one else. Just fantastic.

Episode rating: Like getting a free invisible mom

Favorite bits\random thoughts:

-Pretty much everything Jefferson Twilight said over the course of the episode was brilliant. "Aw man, now I got blue balls in my blood eye!" "They weren't taken by Blackulas, although I can't rule out Caucasian vampires." The entire running gag of Jefferson's lack of usefulness for the Order's particular situation was hilarious.

-There were some more music video references, with the guy in the Captain America-ish getup running through the sewer being coming straight out of this Prodigy video.

-Peter White sitting with a John 3:16 sign in one hand and a margarita in the other
as he's convinced that nuclear annihilation is imminent was kind of out of nowhere but made me laugh for some reason.

-MUTHER being referred to as "some Atari bitch," lol.

Rich Harden

Its been a little while since I posted about the Cubs, but there's no better time to start again than right now. Just a couple of days removed from the Brewers' acquisition of C. C. Sabathia from the Indians, the Cubs made a 6 player trade to nab Rich Harden from the A's. The complete trade is as follows:

A's Trade:

Rich Harden
Chad Gaudin

Cubs Trade:

Matt Murton
Sean Gallagher
Eric Patterson
(Single-A catcher) Josh Donaldson

Harden this year is 5-1 with a 2.34 ERA in 13 starts, which would put him 2nd in the AL in ERA behind teammate Justin Duchsherer were it not for the fact that he's just under the innings pitched requirement to qualify. The biggest concern with him has been injuries, as he's missed some time this year, and made only 13 combined starts in 2006 and 2007. Chad Gaudin has been used as a long reliever and spot starter and has a 3.59 ERA himself. The inclusion of Gaudin is nice as it sort of negates Gallagher's departure in the sense that the Cubs still have some depth if Harden or someone else gets injured.

Getting a pitcher like Rich Harden in a pennant race is a good thing, period, but what makes this truly a great trade is that, although they gave up four players, for the most part its not going to weaken the Cubs MLB club in other areas this season nor should it hinder the farm system much in the future. Obviously, Sean Gallagher is the biggest loss. Even though he was about to head back to the bullpen with the return from the DL of Carlos Zambrano and the emergence of Sean Marshall, he's had several good starts this year. It's possible that he develops into a very good pitcher, but really his is the only loss that really has you wondering "what if we're giving up more than we think?" Matt Murton is 26. He may turn into a viable everyday player in Oakland, but he's not going to get leaps and bounds better than what he is now. He can hit some home runs and he plays hard, but he's somewhat of a liability in the outfield, and doesn't really have the massive power numbers that you'd expect from a starting corner outfielder on a contending team. Murton's been the odd man out in the Cubs' outfield plans for a while now, and you'll recall he started the year in AAA Iowa. Eric Patterson is much younger than Murton and still has time to develop, but during his time in the majors, he has yet to show much evidence that he would be much better than his brother Corey who is currently wasting away on the bench with the Reds.

A playoff rotation of Zambrano/Harden/Dempster (with the added off days that they put in last year--which I hate--a 3-man rotation is really all you'll need) could be incredibly fearsome. This isn't even a "rent-a-player" type of situation, as Harden's contract has a club option for 2009. This is one of the best trades that Jim Hendry has made.

The Cubs beat the Reds at home last night in the opener of the series. They're coming off of a road trip that was shaky, as most of their road play has been to this point, but ended with the Cubs taking 2 out of 3 from the Cardinals at Busch.

[Venture Brothers] Doctor Quymn, Medicine Woman

Season 3 Episode 6: Doctor Quymn, Medicine Woman

Wow. A very hormone filled Venture Brothers this week. Even Dean almost got himself some, and from twins no less! Season 3 has definitely made a much more concerted effort than the last two season of furthering the development of the characters. As Dean says to Hank, "You're not used to be about 'Go Team Venture!", now you're all "Go Team... Boobies!" The kids are growing up, although who knows when the next time will be when they accidentally die and get reverted back to their 16th birthday again. This episode had some so-so parts but also some absolutely classic lines.

Episode rating: Like having a Quicktime of your minty fresh entrance on your Livejournal, even if you raided the wrong place

Favorite bits\random thoughts:

-The aforementioned "Go team boobies!" line, probably the single funniest thing from this season so far.

-Brock, Hank, and Dean teaching a gorilla to box on Dr. Venture's orders, then the monkey
subsequently fighting the "wereodile" at the end.

-I wasn't entirely sure what they were going for with the more-than-a-little-bit disturbing stuff between Ginnie, Dr. Quymn's bodyguard, and Brock. That was just odd. Although Dean yelling "The both of yous got jungle fever!" was amazing.

[Venture Brothers] The Buddy System

Season 3, Episode 5: The Buddy System

A pretty fantastic episode and maybe my favorite from this season. It took place entirely on the Venture compound, and it reminded me a lot of the yard sale episode from the first season. This season's had much more of a main overarching storyline than either of the last two. With Sargent Hatred now apparently done arching Venture, I kind of hope we get an episode that's just sort of self-contained and off the wall nuts like "Escape from the House of Mummies" from last season. Not that these episodes haven't been enjoyable, but I think its time for a reprieve from the storyline they've been working with.

Episode rating: Like a trip to Brisby World

Favorite bits/random thoughts:

-The Order of the Triad's safety song. Radon!

-Brock trying to hire the moppets to beat up the annoying teenage kid, only to realize that they're "pretty creepy"

I forget what else because I've had this saved as a draft for a week and forgot to finish it, but just take my word for it that this was a good episode.

The Friendly Confines

Last week, the Cubs got swept by the Rays on the road (still want to type Devil Rays) in a frustrating series, the last game of which saw the Rays score 7 runs in the 7th to win 8-3. Carlos Marmol failed to retire a batter while walking 2 and hitting another 2 guys. He appeared again in the White Sox series over the weekend, and while it was a less disastrous outing, he still didn't look quite right. Hopefully its not a result of him being overworked (and he has been worked A LOT in the first half of this season-- on pace for about 94 IP). The aforementioned White Sox series was at home and ended up in a sweep, running the Cubs' home winning streak to 14 games. They're an almost unfathomable 32-8 at Wrigley thus far, compared to 16-20 on the road.

Aramis Ramirez had a fantastic series, going 6-for-14 with 4 HRs. He's now one away from trying Derrek Lee and Alphonso Soriano for the team lead at 15. Ryan Dempster almost got his second complete game of the year, running his record to 9-2 with a 2.63 ERA. Dempster now leads the team in ERA, wins, winning percentage, WHIP, and hits per 9 IP. Right now Edinson Volquez is playing out of his mind, but its not inconceivable that Dempster could be in the discussion for Cy Young at the end of the year. With 16 starts under his belt, I think its certainly safe to say that his success isn't a flake and that the work he put in during the off-season made a huge difference in his pitching. He's certainly exceeded my expectations--and I suspect most everyone else's expectations--for how he would perform as a starter.

Carlos Zambrano left his start in Tampa Bay after feeling something in his shoulder. An MRI did not reveal any structural damage, which is great news. He has, however, been placed on the 15-day DL and will miss some time. Sean Marshall is expected to start Tuesday against the Orioles. Right now the Cubs are carrying 14 hitters so someone is going to be sent down. It seemed obvious that it would be Eric Patterson, but Patterson decided to have a huge series against the White Sox going 5-for-8 with a home run and 3 RBIs. Matt Murton, who was called up before the Tampa Bay series might get sent down, though he's had a few key hits as well. Another dilemma is going to present itself when Darryl Ward gets healthy, which Jim Hendry claimed over the weekend might happen as early as this week (I believe he's already on a rehab assignment). In his absense Micah Hoffpauir has been hitting .400 in 35 ABs, and I'm not convinced that Ward is necessarily better than him.

FYI, lest you think I pull these out of my ass, as always all the stats in this post are from Baseball Reference. I can't stress enough how amazing a resource the site is.

[Venture Brothers] Home is Where the Hate is

Season 3, Episode 4: Home is Where the Hate is

Funny episode. Probably not my favorite of the season thus far (gonna give that to "The Doctor is Sin", I think), but funny.

Episode rating: Like a guy with a fever yelling at your pants

Favorite bits & random thoughts:

-21, 24, Hank and Dean determining who could do the best Pac-Man noise. "No, it only sounded like that when you died! When you were just goin' along eating dots it was more like "Wakka-wakka-wakka-wakka..."

-Brock watching a PBS special on "giant crossbows." "I wanna see 'em fire this thing!"

-21 sending in Dean to play Patch Adams for 24, to which 24 can only reply, "I hate you!"

-The Monarch acknowledging that 24 sounds exactly like Ray Ramano

-The Monarch expressing his undying hatred for Dr. Venture, while Dr. Venture assumes that he's still playing the "guess the sign on your back" game. "Am I Hitler? Ohhh, Mariah Carey, of course!"

-Sargent Hatred with "ATRED" spelled down the length of his chest to go along with the "H" on his head.

A Sargent Hatred/Monarch feud has a lot of potential to be funny.

[Venture Brothers] The Invisible Hand of Fate

Season 3, Episode 3: The Invisible Hand of Fate

In a sharp departure from the previous two seasons, three episodes into season 3 of "The Venture Bros." we've already had two episodes that feature the main characters only very briefly. In this case, we learn more about the past of Master Billy Quizboy, namely how in the hell his hand ended up like that. The episode was funny, though it didn't have as many laugh-out-loud moments as the first two episodes. I'd say it was probably the weakest of the three episodes thus far. With that said, the episode is pretty cool in the way it ties up some of the remaining loose ends regarding how characters came to know each other and how they got in their current positions. Its amazing how much care Jackson Publik and Doc Hammer put into keeping the continuity of their show consistent, while still keeping the show fresh and funny.

Anyway, its been 2 weeks now since I've seen this episode so I'm not going to do a full list of bits that I liked, but I do want to point out the sequence at the end that's made up of a bunch of quick cuts with Brock bringing Billy back to Pete and then going off to start "Operation: Rusty's Blanket." It was actually oddly touching.

Sometimes things just go your way

The Cubs finished their west coast road swing against the Dodgers and Padres 4-3, and won their first game back at home against the Braves last night. Ted Lilly recovered after a rough 1st inning to get his 6th win, and the still-best-in-the-NL Cubs offense put up 10 more runs. The best news for the Cubs as far as their playoff chances are concerned may actually be what's happening with St. Louis. The Cardinals are currently the only team reasonably close to the Cubs at 2 1/2 games back (next is the Brewers at 7 1/2 back), and while it certainly seemed as if they were overachieving when they got off to a hot start, they're still 12 over .500 about 40% of the way through the season. If the Cardinals are going to fall of though, this may be the stretch in which it happens. Their top 2 pitchers in terms of ERA, Adam Wainwright and Todd Wellemeyer, have both missed starts with injury, although Wellemeyer's injury isn't believed to be serious at the moment. A much bigger blow may have happened last night, when Albert Pujols left after sustaining a calf injury running out of the box that was described as "pretty bad." The next team after the Cardinals is the Brewers at 33-31, who have not hit nearly as well as expected (they're currently 14th in the NL in batting average and OBP). Rickie Weeks is hitting .210, J.J. Hardy's hitting .242, and Prince Fielder has a good but not great OPS of .825 with 10 HRs. They'll probably finish out better offensively than they're playing now, but it certainly doesn't look like the team is going to have improved leaps and bounds from last year, as many thought. The Cubs's road to winning the division hasn't had too many bumps in it to this point.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (***)

It's been 19 years since we last saw our whip adept, ophidiophobic, archaeologist on an adventure containing giant rolling stones of death, melting Nazis, heart stealing witch doctors, Alfred Molina, or some combination thereof. When we see Indiana Jones now in Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, he's a step or two slower and has a lot more gray hair, but the same basic formula is still in place, as Stephen Spielberg, George Lucas, and Harrison Ford reunite for one last installment of the franchise. There's still all manner of chase sequences on period accurate vehicles of all sorts, there's still ancient burial sites with deviously clever traps, and there's still villains everywhere trying to cramp Indy's style and claim the treasure for themselves. Yet, the synergy of all these radio serial adventure type elements don't really add up to as good a finished product this time around, although the movie is still certainly an entertaining watch.

The film begins in 1958 with Indy and "Mac", an old acquaintance he's known from World War II being held captive by Russians, who pose as U.S. army personnel and break into Area 51 in the Nevada Desert. They are led by Cate Blanchett, a completely stereotypical Russian villainess (think: "I will crush the American capitalist scum with my superior Russian intellect!", that sort of thing) who specializes in the paranormal and is researching artifacts that can be used for "psychic warfare". I suppose I shouldn't spoil it, but within the military warehouse she finds something of interest to her that ties into the plot later on. Indy meanwhile, uses a distraction to start whipping people like the good old days, and tries to escape, leading to what is probably the best of the myriad chase sequences throughout the movie. Harrison Ford's performance is probably at its best during these early scenes. He's old, he's grumpy, he seems to be sort of worn out of these strange situations he always gets himself into, and it adds up to being very funny.

After this relatively encouraging opening which ends with some of the most preposterous deus ex machinas of all time, we see that Dr. Jones is still a university professor, and so we get a few plot points to get him back out of the classroom. On a train out of town, Jones meets Mutt (Shia LaBueff), a high school drop out greaser and biker mechanic who tells Dr. Jones that one of his colleages, Dr. Oxley or "Ox" has gone missing in South America. Turns out Ox (who is played by John Hurt for some reason even though he doesn't have much to do other than act crazy) has been committed to a sanitarium after he sound a legendary crystal skull that is the source for the movie's subtitle and is the goal of the quest in this iteration. As it turns out, who'd have thunk it, but the same Russians from the movie's first sequence are going after the skull as well because its believed to have psychic powers. Indy and Mutt go tomb raiding and find the skull in its original resting place--Ox had returned it for yet to be revealed reasons--only to find that the Russians are waiting outside for them.

It's once Indy and Mutt head into the jungles of Peru with the Russians that my tolerance for some of the movie's cliches and over-the-top ridiculousness started to waver. I understand that the entire Indiana Jones franchise is based off of old serial adventure stories and indeed that's a big reason why the original trilogy was so fun, but there is a point when your suspension of disbelief is just shot and it's all too much. For me, this was somewhere around the time when Indy and company along with the Russians are riding in a convoy of trucks along the outskirts of the jungle, and monkeys come out of the trees and seemingly instinctively know to go bat shit crazy on the villains and leave the main characters alone completely.

There is more silliness when Marion (played by Karen Allen, as she was in Raiders) pops up in the film, coincidentally also captured by the Russians. There seems to be little point in her being in the movie, except to engage in completely unfunny banter with Indy every once in a while. There are multiple instances of the clichéd "let's have an argument about our relationship even though we're in extreme danger right now" bit that completely fall flat. Beyond that, she never really seems concerned at all about any of what's going on around her during the action sequences. There are times in which Mutt and Indy are literally under fire from a dozen Russian troops and this will be intercut with a shot of Karen Allen with a sort of contended half-smile on her face. I also thought the film had a few two many in-references and moments that were very self-aware of the fact that this was the big long-expected fourth Indiana Jones movie. In particular, there are a lot of moments where Indy is able to get his hat back at the last minute despite losing it while a crazy amount of stuff is happening to him. Sometimes its funny, sometimes its just too clever by half.

Once all these chase sequences are done with and the true nature of the skull, and why Oxley was going nuts, and all the other mysteries in the film are solved, there is a climactic sequence that's very much reminiscent of how Raiders or Last Crusade ended, and yet somehow isn't as satisfying. Maybe it's the heavy and obvious use of CGI, or the fact that the big reveal at the end is in some ways even more ambitious than the "oh shit, Judeo-Christian mythology is real and the Nazis are going to get what's coming to them!" moments from the previous films, but it just doesn't quite add up the way the endings to said films did.

Even with all this going against the movie, I do think it's worth viewing, if perhaps only after it leaves theaters and comes to DVD. While I think the script for this latest iteration was somewhat phoned in, and the action sequences are much more clichéd and uninspired than you would expect from Spielberg, some of the Indy allure is still there. Harrison Ford's performance is very good, and he does a great job of maintaining the quick wit and grittiness that's always been in the character, while making him more world-weary and more of a cynical old man sort. In no way is this movie destined to become a Spielberg classic, but its not a complete disaster.

[Venture Brothers] The Doctor is Sin

Season 3, Episode 2: The Doctor is Sin

After the Monarch and Dr. Girlfriend-centric season premiere, we get an episode that focuses again on the Venture family themselves first and foremost. We learn that ever since The Monarch stopped arching Dr. Venture, many a villain has attempted to take The Monarch's place only to get their asses handed to them by Brock (who gets a little tired of it after a while). Between this and the fact that the military doesn't seem to think too much of his new inventions (which seem to be mostly his father's old inventions) Rusty finds himself in rut. Enter: Dr. Henry Killinger, who shows his extensive resume and immediately begins to rejuvenate Venture Industries (but at what cost? dun dun dunnnn). Another episode, of which there were several last season, that doesn't really seem to be going anywhere in terms of story at first, but ends up not only having a satisfying conclusion, but is hilarious.

Episode Rating: Like having your own team of non-union, government paid Vench-men

Favorite bits & random thoughts:

-Brock gives pretty much the only appropriate answer to Dr. Venture's question "Am I a good person?": "Eh..." complete with the side-to-side hand wave thing.
-Apparently the magic murder bag actually is a magic murder bag. And a quite effective one at that.
-In the season 2 commentary they claimed that season 3 wouldn't have any Star Wars references. Well, I think in the 2nd episode there's already been one, as Dr. Killinger tells Rusty to enter the odd virtual world that apparently exists inside his bag and he answers Rusty's question of "What's in there" with "Only what you take with you." I'm pretty sure that's exactly what Yoda tells Luke when he goes into the cave and sees the bogus Darth Vader. At any rate, it was funny. If they want to continue to break their commitment to no Star Wars references that's fine with me.
-Dr. Orpheus leaving the building with his European business man costume on, then running in plain sight while taking off his costume and going to put on the next one was just fantastic.
-The Lion King-esque face in the clouds ending: completely random but also fantastic. "You can learn more about it in The Bible"
-The Alchemist is still around, but where's Jefferson Twilight?

Iron Man

Iron Man (***1/2)

I'm sort of late to the party on Iron Man, which came out in early May and immediately made tons of money and got tons of hype. Having finally seen it last weekend, I can confirm that the hype was very much justified, and that the movie proves that it is still possible to make a superhero movie that doesn't feel like a cookie-cutter re-branding of another movie, despite how many superhero movies are out there now. It's a very intelligently written movie, and it manages to maintain a certain degree of unpredictability, despite having the core "Guy becomes hero, hero discovers villain, hero beats up villain" plotline that most of these Marvel/DC movies are based around.

The movie begins by introducing us to Tony Stark, who is very much true to his character's portrayal in Marvel comics. He's a genius when it comes to engineering, but he's also a drinker, a womanizer, and in just about every other way someone who lives live with reckless abandon. This is how he's first presented to us as he's riding in a Humvee with U.S. soldiers on his way back from a weapons demonstration for his company, Stark Industries, somewhere in Afghanistan. Things hit a snag for him, to put it mildly, when the convoy of Humvees is the target of an attack and Tony finds himself in the hands of a terrorist organization (a fictional one, whose members are made up of many different nationalities, no doubt to stave off controversy). He has shrapnel lodged in his chest that would've pierced his heart and killed him, were it not for another scientist captured with him who keeps him alive with an electromagnet hooked up to a car battery (I strongly question the validity of the medicine behind all this but whatever, it's a comic book movie). In a cruel twist of fate, Stark realizes that he's being kept alive so he can build the very missile he just demonstrated for the U.S. military for his captors.

Stark, of course, has other ideas, and creates an early prototype of the Iron Man suit and uses it to escape. He also makes a breakthrough in "arc reactor" technology (no idea if this has a real world equivalent, be it actually functional or theoretical), which he uses to power the electromagnet in his chest without him having to be dragging a car battery along. Upon his return to the U.S. he has a sort of epiphany and decides that Stark Industries, despite being primary a weapons manufacturer, since the weapons keep ending up in the hands of the wrong people. This doesn't go over well with Obadiah Stane (Jeff Bridges), who briefly headed the company after Tony's father died but before Tony was old enough to become CEO himself.

Much of the next section of the film tracks Tony's progress as he designs a new and improved Iron Man suit--without letting Obadiah or the rest of the company know--in the lab in his mansion. He does it with the help of Jarvis, the personality of the super-sophisticated AI that controls his entire house. In a movie in which everything that's not owned by Tony Stark basically resembles our, normal present day world, the fact that Jarvis seems to rival the computer from Star Trek: The Next Generation in intelligence is a little cartoonish, but I can forgive that because a. it's a comic book movie and b. it leads to some extremely funny exchanges between Tony and the various robotic appendages that Jarvis controls. Tony's near obsessive level of devotion to his new project concerns his devoted, if perhaps somewhat overwhelmed at times, assistant, Pepper Potts (Gweneth Paltrow). She doesn't have a huge role, but there are some very good scenes in which we see her doing the best she can to be a companion to the loner that is Tony Stark while not encouraging his more self-destructive habits. Their relationship has some vague sexual tension, but doesn't turn into a hokey love story which at times seem to be a prerequisite for any big Hollywood movie. This, along with the fact that the movie is more about Tony building the suit and taking on the identity of Iron Man than him endlessly fighting random guys as Iron Man makes the movie stand out amongst the cluster**** of big budget superhero movies, and hopefully will influence the myriad superhero movies that are still on the way.

The movie ends with the requisite hero vs. villain confutation, and has the much expected "greed is bad, selfless is good" morality tale woven in, but the movie is well-written enough and the performances by Downey Jr., Bridges, and Paltrow are good enough such that the movie feels like it has something unique to contribute to the genre and isn't just a cookie-cutter duplicate of other movies with a different guy in a different costume. It also sets itself up for sequel in a way that actually makes you believe that a sequel would actually branch out from what the original was, instead of just swapping villains and rehashing mostly the same plot. This is a superhero movie done right.

[Venture Brothers] Shadowman 9: In the Cradle of Destiny

Season 3, Episode 1: Shadowman 9: In the Cradle of Destiny

The Venture Bros. is one of my favorite shows currently airing on TV, animated or otherwise, and the almost 2 year wait for season 3 to start has been absolutely brutal. At long last its here, and if the first episode is any indication, co-creators Jackson Publick and Doc Hammer (yeah, those are their actual names) haven't missed a beat. If you've never seen the show it's nigh impossible for it to be fully explained to you, but my attempt at a one sentence summary is this: It's like Johnny Quest on crack. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend checking it out, but in the meantime here's some random thoughts on the season 3 premiere for those already indoctrinated.

Rating: Like two ninjas taped together to form one giant ninja

Favorite bits/quotes: (with aid from The Mantis Eye Experiment)

-The Monarch: Oh man, if that shows up on YouTube- I- I'm serious! What kind of torture is this? Couldn't you just drill my teeth, or shove bamboo under my nails or something.
Councilman: This is not a torture, Mr. Monarch.
Councilman: It is an interrogation!
Councilman: Or a trial of sorts!
Councilman: I always say, it's a crucible.
Councilman: Oh that's way cooler!

-The Henchmen rolling away a giant penny, referencing the one that's always shown in the Bat Cave.

-The Monarch tearing through Dr. Ventures lab with his early, crappy version of the Monarch mobile, pulling a lever up and down while he's driving to make the crudely attached wings on top flap.

-The Monarch: I would have taken him down then if Venture hadn't hired a private army of ex-Navy Seal ninja witches to protect him. Also my memory is a little foggy, but I'm pretty sure he had a fucking tank.

-The Monarch: Wait, wait, did that video have a wipe?
Councilman: Councilman 3 got Adobe Premiere.
Councilman 3: Was it too showy? I thought it would make the scene more lively.